What is success?

For 10 years I’ve wanted to blog.  I’ve attempted more times than I could even count, and never “succeeded”.  Or at least, I thought so. 

But really, what does it mean to SUCCEED at blogging?  Does it mean that you have 250,000 subscribers, instagram followers, and your own youtube channel?  If that is why I’m blogging then there is no real passion behind the words.  I’ve tried to blog about saving money, running, and just NOTHING.  Still, I never felt like it would be successful. 

Recently, I’ve struggled about purpose.  My two girls are in school full-time and after being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) for 10 years I got to that point where I said, “Now what?”  I no longer have a preschooler that needs me 90% of the day.  That 90% of time is now spent at school, with the teachers who are loving and helping to mold them, but what about me?  I have a great home business that helps pay the bills, and I LOVE what I am able to do with it, but it doesn’t take 7 hours a day.  So how do I fill those hours?

In the words of Gru, “LIGHT BULB” 

Enter BLOGGING

My words may never be read by anyone but my best friends and my mom, and that is OK!  I don’t need to have hundreds of thousands of followers.  This blog is for ME!  For me to put my words out there and if people read them and are inspired to be better, do more, or are challenged to dive into God’s word then I’ve done my job.  

Dear Target Mama

I saw you this morning.  I immediately recognized the tired look in your eyes as you pushed a fussy toddler through the house wares at 8:30 this morning.  I know too well that messy bun on top of your head, wrinkled t-shirt that you probably slept in, and the goldfish bag that you probably haven’t paid for yet.  You saw me, too.  For a brief moment we made eye contact.  Me, the mom with her hair and make up done, cute top and Capri pants, no kid in tow.  You may have even thought, “What a treat it must be to go to target alone at 8:30am.”

I was once you.  I was once that tired mama, dragging a toddler to target to run our errands, because the older child was at school, and the toddler was awake so we might as well.  Though it is enjoyable to shop alone, and be able to get myself dressed now that my kids are in school.  I miss it.  I miss the toddler days.  I miss Disney jr, goldfish on the couch, and blowing bubbles in the yard.  My time with my girls is now filled with homework and scheduled activities.  We no longer have the freedoms of story time and spur of the moment zoo trips. 

So Target mama, embrace these days.  Embrace the messy hair, stained t-shirt, and goldfish crumbs.  Because the days may be long, but oh sister, the years are so short.